This article was first published on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/intuition-menopause-you-feeling-psychic-energy-ruth-ann-richards-hy71e
“At midlife, more psychic energy becomes available to us than at any time since adolescence.” Dr Christiane Northrup M.D.
For the longest time, women have been trapped in the patriarchal approach to dealing with menopause. By that I mean that the physical symptoms that can accompany menopause are viewed and treated through a medical system that is based on a patriarchal approach. The changes that surround women through this period (pun intended) of our lives is more than the physical hormonal changes in our body, it is about how we feel as an individual about our place in the world. How we feel at this time in our lives and how we approach the impending changes is as much based on society’s conditioning as it is our individual physical body.
What the medical research and the stories of women’s lived experience do not tell us, is that this time in our lives provides an opportunity to reclaim our intuition. To pause (again, pun intended) and remember that there is a part of us that has a knowing that does not come from formal education, that is not based on our life’s experiences but comes from a different place. It comes from a place of the Other Worldly and during this time of our life, should we choose to be, we can be receivers for this guidance. We can reclaim our intuition.
Note: The term menopause was coined by a man. Menopause – from the Greek men (month) and pausis (cessation) was a term coined by French physician Charles Pierre Louis De Gardanne in 1812 (la menopausie)
Each Women’s Experience is Unique
I first started reading up about menopause in my early 40s as I knew very little about it and I wanted to prepare myself for it. Part of my reason for doing this is because most of what I knew about this part of life was negative. I decided I wanted to found out some facts.
I read loads of books and articles. Some I did not finish reading because the woman’s experience was difficult and challenging. From a woman who was severely depressed and could not get out of bed, to loss of confidence, constantly crying and lack of self-esteem. Everything I read was so negative, I started to panic. How the hell was I going to get through all of this?
On reflection, most of these negative experiences were not focused on the physical aspects but were emotional and psychological. At the time though, it made me wonder, surely, there had to be another viewpoint about menopause?
A new narrative – or perhaps rediscovering the original narrative
I continued looking for facts about menopause, rather than more lived experience I looked for something positive. Fortunately, I found two books by the same author. Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom and The Wisdom of Menopause both by Dr Christiane Northrop.
About the time of reading The Wisdom of Menopause, I also found more online research that showed me that across the world, women had different experiences of menopause. * That felt like proof to me that menopause was more than just something physical and that our experienced depended on society and conditioning. So if where we are in the world means we have a different experience of menopause then is there mind-body-soul connection? And if there is a mind-body-soul connection, can I choose how I want to experience menopause?
This research, Dr Christiane’s books and these thoughts finally brought me some hope. Perhaps I could focus on making this chapter of my life positive and filled with wisdom. This is when my narrative about menopause started to change.
I am forever grateful for the book The Wisdom of Menopause as Christiane Northrup also talks about her personal experience. Menopause for some women also coincides with children leaving home and other changes in family circumstances. This can raise all kinds of emotions at a time when hormones they-are-a-changing. Dr Christane goes beyond what the physical issues are, but looks at the experience holistically.
A little advice: The Widsom of Menopause is a big book. Unless you are a super-human reader, it can be difficult to read in go (unless you have a whole week free). It is a book to frequently dip in and out of, to read the chapters that most resonate with you.
Reading this book confirmed to me that there is a heart, body, mind and soul connection and it gave me an idea.
Honouring My Body
The idea was to have a chat with my body. I appreciate it may sound mad to you, but intuitively I knew that my body was going need to my attention at this time of life. I knew that I wanted a positive experience of menopause. I really did not want all those symptoms and the sadness I had previously read about. I was ready to embrace the freedom and the sheer joy of no more periods.
I wanted to give my body permission to have a healthy menopause.
So I had a chat with my body. Really, just a chat. I wish now there had been some magical ceremony I could have attended to mark this new phase of my life and thank my body for all its work. But it was just me at home, talking to myself.
I thanked my body for all she had done. She had brought my periods regularly every month. Yes, there had been pain, but when you are releasing an egg every month, it is a physical sensation for the body, and the pain as well as being physical, was a reflection of the loss of motherhood for that month.
Other things I talked to my body about included not having children (in this lifetime). I had come to peace with that in my early 40s. Had I really wanted children, I would have done something about it. My life had been full of exciting adventures and meaning without children and I was grateful for that. I told my body she had no reason to feel any guilt about not bearing children.
I told her that she had done her job well during these years of potential ‘childbearing’. She had done exactly what she was supposed to do and I was very grateful to her for that. After all the work she had done, I told her it was time to rest from such physical activity. I even said that we did not need to have the symptoms associated with menopause. I promised to listen to what she told me, such as going to the toilet when I need to go, instead of thinking, I’ll just finish this or just do another five minutes task, but to go when I felt the need. I told her how much I was looking forward to this chapter of my life and gaining wisdom to be a wise woman and that I felt that it would be an exciting time of our life with more adventures.
Whilst periods finishing is the end of being able to bear children, which can be a hard issue for some women to cope with mentally, I was at peace with it.
I had this chat several times over. I was ready to embrace this phase of my life.
A New Chapter
There was one other thing that helped me embrace freedom at this time of my life.
During my thirties I had worked on a project with two fabulous, visible and empowering women, who were then in their fifties. One evening whilst at dinner, they both told me how liberating it was being in their fifties. They could say what they wanted, they did not have to conform to expectations anymore. They said there was a freedom in life. Their experiences in life and this physical change in their bodies, changed them. To this day, I remember how we were seated round the table and how I intently I listened to what they had to say. And I thought, wow, I’m looking forward to that.
What I didn’t know then was how much being intuitive would feature in this chapter of my life.
This Chapter’s Purpose
It turns out, that intuition and supporting women how to reclaim their intuition is the thing I was meant to be doing all along. To use our intuition to feel empowered, to take our place in the world, to speak up, stand up and embrace living an intuitive and spiritual life.
And that is why I am happy to call my experience, the change. Because menopause has changed me for the better.
It has made me face up to my own intuitive gift and beyond that to tell other people about it. That has not been easy at times, in fact it has been downright scary. It has brought wisdom what I could have expected and allowed me to be a version of myself that feels authentic and most of the time it feels easy. Being me is the greatest gift I have at this time of my life.
Your experience
I acknowledge that there are many women right now who feel they are suffering with the symptoms associated with menopause. You have the right to make your choice on how you deal with this. Whether you chose medication or alternative methods it is your choice to decide what is right for your body. I would not judge any women for feeling the right course of action for her was take medication.
But whatever your experience of perimenopause, menopause and post menopause, I encourage, ask and urge you to consider your whole self. This time of our life is beyond the mind-body connection.
This has been true for me. If wish to embrace this sentiment, it could be true for you too.
If you are feeling the call to reclaim your intuition and would like support, you can find out more about my services at www.ruthannrichards.com. If you want to chat before making an appointment start by emailing me at support@theintuitionconnection.com
Love and peace.
Ruth
*Here are some links on research of how menopause is experienced differently around the world.
India: Anthropologist Martha Flint conducted a study in 1970 of 483 women in India and found that most complained of no symptoms during Menopause other than menstrual changes. It was noted that the Indian diet is plant-based with a high intake of phytoestrogens. Global Menopause Perspectives and Cultural Variations
Mayan Women: Mayan women tend to look forward to menopause because it comes with a progressive change in status within their communities and a feeling of freedom. These women reported no hot flashes/flushes or any other significant symptoms of menopause. https://www.everydayhealth.com/menopause/menopause-and-culture.aspx
Japan: Koneki is the Japanse word for this phase of life and means “renewal years” and energy. The Japanese language does not have an equivalent world for the English phrase “hot flash” and Japanese women are reported as experiencing fewer hot flashes than their North American sisters. However, shoulder stiffness was their most reported system. Diet could also be a factor for Japanese women as the Japanese diet tends to incorporate high (compared to Europe and North America) amounts of soybean, which is a potential explain for the reporting fewer hot flashes. https:/heikeyates.com/culture-menopause-around-the-world
Western Society: The most common symptoms, of which there are at least 34 known physical and emotional side effects of menopause in western society, are: hot flashes (or flushes if you’re in the UK), night sweats, mood swings, vaginal dryness, memory loss, fatigue, weight gain, irritability and hair loss. https:/heikeyates.com/culture-menopause-around-the-world